STURGIS GOLF CARTS,
PART I (HILARIOUS)
The Sturgis Bike Rally (officially known as the Black Hills Motorcycle Rally) is the biggest bike rally in the world. Several times, the number of attendees has been over a half million. (WHAAAT?!) In fact, I’m certain that during the rally, there are way, way more bikers than law enforcement personnel in both Dakotas, Wyoming, and Montana put together.
Sturgis is a small town in southwestern South Dakota, about an hour’s ride from Mt. Rushmore and the Crazy Horse Monument. Because the population is under 10,000, you may think that, with a half million bikers partying for nine days, destruction and violence would be rampant. But it’s not like that, not like that at all.
The truth is, when it comes to destruction and violence, those nine days of biker-partying are safer than 85-90%, sometimes 95% of the rest of the country.
For me, the Sturgis rally was enjoyable, violence-free, and friendly. But then, odd things did happen. Like this one inexplicable thing that had to do with a golf cart.
I stayed late at the Wolfman Jack concert area one night and got lost while walking back to my tent. I knew it was somewhere sort of near one of the corners of the 560 acre Buffalo Chip Campground, my home for the nine-day rally. But which corner? Had no idea.
The more I walked, the more I got lost, and the more nothing looked familiar. I mean, I came across all sorts of unexpected things, like a dirt race track that I didn’t even know existed. Finally, I saw a golf cart with a guy in the driver’s seat, and a girl and another guy sitting on the far back seat facing backwards.
I walked over. I told them I was lost, described where my tent was, and asked if they knew how to get there. They did know, but instead of giving me directions, they offered to take me there, which was real neighborly.
I sat next to the driver then he proceeded to give me a long, roundabout tour of an area of the Buffalo Chip that looked like it was from another world.
When we finally got to my tent, I graciously thanked the driver. (It truly was a neighborly thing he’d done.) However, when I went to thank the other two, the guy was standing up facing forward and the girl was sitting in a welcoming position still facing backward.
Yep, during my long, roundabout tour of the Chip, they had been perfecting their skills for making babies. Wanting to be civilized, I thanked them as well, shook their hands, and wished them a fulfilling night.
3 Forks, Muddy Gap is pretty much in the middle of the proverbial nowhere. But then, it’s in Wyoming so, you know, that’s not unusual. However, despite being in that proverbial nowhere, I’d be willing to give odds that over the years, more than a million Sturgis-bound bikers have stopped here to grab a soda, stretch their legs, and fill their tanks.
Always appreciate signs like this.
Gotta love motorcycle-only parking!
Wamsutter, party capital of the world!
This is the sign at the entrance of the Buffalo Chip Campground, my home for nine days. It says
CAMPGROUNDS, MOTORCYCLE RALLIES, CONCERTS AND PUBLIC GATHERINGS MAY BE DANGEROUS AND ATTENDANCE MAY RESULT IN INJURY OR DEATH.
Injury or Death? Uh … oh, what the heck! I’m in!
My first look at downtown Sturgis. If you noticed that there are no cars, there’s a good reason. During the rally, cars are not allowed downtown. (Gawd, I love this rally!)
The Batmobile bike!
Another proof that biker chicks are the hottest. But you have to admit that she’s been riding bitch* a little too long. But hey, look at all the beads!
*Riding bitch is when a lady rides on the back seat of a bike. Despite what some may think, it’s a position of honor.
There must be a motorcycle helmet law in South Dakota, right? This guy’s proof of it, right?
(Actually, in South Dakota, motorcycle helmets are required only for riders and passengers under 18 years old.)
One of the hundreds (thousands?) of different t-shirts for sale. (Despite the misspelling, ya gotta love bikers.)
The reason this is a common stopping spot is that it’s the first view of the Mount Rushmore National Memorial. Mt Rushmore is fifty-some-odd miles from Sturgis.
